I was happy today. I say that with some incredulity because it's a rather rare occurrence for me. I often sit and wonder what it must be like to feel happy. I'll have vague recollections of what happiness is like, of having felt completely happy, but it's elusive. I won't quite be able to put my finger on the feeling. And then, unexpectedly, I felt it. And it was such a relief. I thought “wow, so this is how normal people feel; it's really nice!”
Now I want to figure out why, what did I do differently and can I replicate it? I've been taking more Omega-3's this week, as recommended in “The Depression Cure”. Did they just kick in? Ive been feeling closer to God lately; I'm sure He's helping me out. I kept busy, doing errands to the library, and several stores, but didn't overdo it. I got my Christmas shopping just about done (it's very satisfying to get exactly what you want and with good buys too). I exercised a good amount. I had the pleasure of seeing the dogs playing. I did some reading, had a brief rest, and watched some tv (the world tumbling and trampolining championships, “As Time Goes By” and “Keeping Up Appearances”). There was music in my life too courtesy of a John Denver special (I just love his singing!) and Dan playing guitar in the background.
Everything seemed to work out right today: my timing was right, I wasn't ruining things by fretting and worrying; I was pretty much living in the moment, just enjoying where I was and what I was doing. Things just felt right and good. I wish I could bottle this feeling - or better still make a medicine I could take whenever necessary. It's so nice to know happiness can exist even for me. I only hope it isn't such a stranger in my life in the future as it has been in the past.
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